Neti, Neti

In the Upanishads a teacher describes the self by saying what it is not: “not this, not this,” or neti, neti. Each description is tried and set aside. The body is not the self, nor the mood, nor the name. The point is not to empty the person out but to stop mistaking a part for the whole.

We do a mild version daily. A title, a score, a role or a bad day starts to feel like who we are. The practice is to hold each label loosely: it is true in its place, and it is not the last word.

Later teachers of Advaita Vedanta read the method this way: what remains after the labels are set down is the one who notices them, the witness.

The job title

Ravi loses the job he has held for fifteen years. For weeks he tells people, “I’m a manager,” and then, “I was a manager,” and he feels there is nothing behind the words.

A friend suggests a pause: “Are you only your job?” Ravi answers neti, neti to the title, the salary, even the worry. What is left is someone who can still learn, cook and keep a promise, and he starts from there.

Try this today Finish the sentence “I am…” three times, then answer each with “not only that.”